😇: Ezekiel 18:31
📚: Cast away from all your transactions, whereby ye have transgressed; and make you a new heart and new spirit.
Inspired By: Behold the Lilies- Daily Meditations for Christian Women (Verna Mast & Susan Schwartz)
😇: Psalm 146:8
📚: The Lord opens the eyes of the blind; The Lord raises up those who are bowed down; The Lord loves the righteous.
IIt’s a Good Morning Just Because You Love Me, Open, Lifted, and Loved (Diane Dahlen, Cari Dugan, Laura Krause, Shannon Lindsay, Cate Mezyk, Stephanie Sample)
“Creating In Me a Clean Heart–It’s not for the Faint”
🦄: Unbeknownst to me at the time, 2018 marked the beginning of a new journée for me. I was unprepared for what followed, but one of my Father’s angels that have helped me to navigate this treacherous adventure, assured me that all was well. I was just in the process of gaining my experience. I immediately told Ms. Vee, that I wanted no parts of this assignment and that God was welcome to allow someone else to gain this awesome experience. After much disobedience, avoidance, and fear I finally arrived to an accord with #theBossofme. But accepting and doing are two different tasks. And it’s the doing that has me revisiting the past with a unquenchable longing. Especially now during this holiday season.
In 2018 I suffered a random series of events which cumulated in self-inflicted loss of life and resurrection by medicine. From my secular prospective, things continued to deteriorate from there. But that was the only perspective I was entertaining at the time– as I was still holding a grudge against God for calling home my Mom, Husband, Brothers, and Daddy and leaving me to navigate this cruel world tribeless. It took me, with the help of my God, forty-three years to build a life that I could be proud of: I’d raised two beautiful daughters, I maintained a nice home for them. I had a career, of a sorts, where I excelled. And I’d found an outlet to be in service to others on a daily basis. (Of course, I also made countless mistakes and errors along the way.) It only took two years for me to lose all of it. Including the remaining tribal relationships that had sustained me up until that point.
Now as I begin the yearly reflections and wrap-up, I realized something. Those tribal relationships, while important, are not what sustained me. That was God’s grace and mercy all along. As I embark on the present season of harvest, I must constantly remind myself that God is in charge of my life. He knows what He is doing. If I’ve proved anything, it’s that I have no idea what I’m doing, even at the best of times.
When I feel my peace with God is just beyond my grasp, “I must find out what I did to lose it and then repent on that thing.”1 The word repent is one of those whose meaning has changed since the time it was first recorded in scripture. The c. 1300 definition according to Etymonline is, “to feel such regret for sins or crimes as produces amendment of life”. It’s simple, really. I just have to figure out what is troubling me, learn from it, and make amends. Just like magique, my peace is restored.
I remember learning from Ms. Dee (at a different resting place),: “The past is over-throw it out with the trash- it can’t be changed. Today is the present- A GIFT- each day begins anew with limitless possibilities. Tomorrow is the future-it hasn’t happed yet- plan for it, but don’t dwell on it.” Training myself to live in the moment, with no regrets from the past (as they have all been repented and amended to the best of my ability) and little concern for the future goes against everything I have learned from my fellow man. Unfortunately my tribe learned the same lessons from man that I did; they just have yet to figure out that there are better lessons to be gleaned from God!
I am so grateful that “God opens the eyes of the blind” (Psalm 146:8) and loves to restore life to his creation. I am blessed that he “opened my eyes to the truth, ministered to my broken spirit, and restored me to righteousness.”2 If he delivered me from the hands of the enemy, I am certain He will do the same for the rest of my tribe. We were not created to be alone. In scripture, 1 Peter uses the example of a hunting lion to describe the enemies process of winning through division and isolation. We will always be much stronger together than apart, in spite of past mistakes and choices.
🦋: God will aid in my quest for peace within my tribe; I need only ask Him.
🎬: I must let the God of encouragement and restoration be my strength, today.
🎬: Feel free to share notes & references from your 12.07.2020 Prayer/Meditation/Spirituality in the comments below. 💜😇👸🏽🦋🦄
Alcoholics Anonymous “Third Step Prayer”
God, I offer myself to Thee, to build with me and do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy power, Thy love, and Thy way of life. May I do Thy will always! In Jesus name, Amen.